The number one reason marriages end in divorce.
So, you want to know the number one reason marriages end in divorce?
To be completely honest, I don't know the number one reason why marriages end in divorce. I just wanted to catch your eye. HAH! but since you are here....
I DO know that when trust is broken it can be extremely hard to repair. Sam (my husband) and I have gone through our fair share of struggles in our short 5 years of marriage. Trust has been broken & repaired and broken again and repaired again. On both of our ends! I'm not talking about adultery here, I'm talking about the small things - the things that you don't realize are stunting the growth of your relationship. Saying you'll be on time & showing up late, spending money before consulting the other person, putting your own selfish needs above the other, breaking promises... These are the small things that put cracks in the foundation and later can make the whole building collapse. Sam and I talk a lot on how we can work to build a strong foundation in these early years of our marriage. We want to be sure that we are putting in the effort to build trust consistently. We constantly work to prove that we are trustworthy and that we are capable of taking care of the other person's heart. I know for me, I want my marriage to be the safest place - to know that I can come to Sam with anything and know that he will always receive me and allow me to be real. Getting to this place takes work but its a work that will always, always be worth it.
Some of the small ways we've learned to build trust...
1. First and foremost, pray together and for one another. This can and will change the entire direction of your relationship!
2. When you say you will do something, do it. Don't keep putting it off. Make it a priority.
3. Give the other person opportunity to break your trust. You can not control anyone - not even your spouse. If you put up a 1,000 boundaries and constantly hold them to it, how do you know you can trust them when they're on their own?
4. Repent to your spouse, apologize for the times you have been wrong. No excuses given, just an honest raw apology.
5. LISTEN to your spouse. Hear what they are saying and repeat back to them what you heard- to be sure you are understanding them correctly. Then put in the effort to think of their needs above your own.
To be completely honest, I don't know the number one reason why marriages end in divorce. I just wanted to catch your eye. HAH! but since you are here....
I DO know that when trust is broken it can be extremely hard to repair. Sam (my husband) and I have gone through our fair share of struggles in our short 5 years of marriage. Trust has been broken & repaired and broken again and repaired again. On both of our ends! I'm not talking about adultery here, I'm talking about the small things - the things that you don't realize are stunting the growth of your relationship. Saying you'll be on time & showing up late, spending money before consulting the other person, putting your own selfish needs above the other, breaking promises... These are the small things that put cracks in the foundation and later can make the whole building collapse. Sam and I talk a lot on how we can work to build a strong foundation in these early years of our marriage. We want to be sure that we are putting in the effort to build trust consistently. We constantly work to prove that we are trustworthy and that we are capable of taking care of the other person's heart. I know for me, I want my marriage to be the safest place - to know that I can come to Sam with anything and know that he will always receive me and allow me to be real. Getting to this place takes work but its a work that will always, always be worth it.
Some of the small ways we've learned to build trust...
1. First and foremost, pray together and for one another. This can and will change the entire direction of your relationship!
2. When you say you will do something, do it. Don't keep putting it off. Make it a priority.
3. Give the other person opportunity to break your trust. You can not control anyone - not even your spouse. If you put up a 1,000 boundaries and constantly hold them to it, how do you know you can trust them when they're on their own?
4. Repent to your spouse, apologize for the times you have been wrong. No excuses given, just an honest raw apology.
5. LISTEN to your spouse. Hear what they are saying and repeat back to them what you heard- to be sure you are understanding them correctly. Then put in the effort to think of their needs above your own.
6. Go to counseling- end the stigma that it is only for when problems arise. Counseling is like getting an oil change for your car. You do it to maintain good condition & to keep it running smoothly.
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